(I tried to get some documentation out of Digital on this, but as far as I can tell even _they_ don't have it ;-)\n-- Linus Torvalds, in an article on a dnserver
Q: Why shouldn't I simply delete the stuff I never use, it's just taking up space?|A: This question is in the category of Famous Last Words..\n-- From the Frequently Unasked Questions
Q: What's the big deal about rm, I have been deleting stuff for years?  And never lost anything.. oops!|A: ...\n-- From the Frequently Unasked Questions
Linux is addictive, I'm hooked!\n-- MaDsen Wikholm's .sig
panic("Foooooooood fight!");\n-- In the kernel source aha1542.c, after detecting a bad segment list
Footnotes are for things you believe don't really belong in LDP manuals, but want to include anyway.\n-- Joel N. Weber II discussing the 'make' chapter of LPG
Ok, I'm just uploading the new version of the kernel, v1.3.33, also known as "the buggiest kernel ever".\n-- Linus Torvalds
Go not unto the Usenet for advice, for you will be told both yea and nay (and quite a few things that just have nothing at all to do with the question).\n-- seen in a .sig somewhere
Those who don't understand Linux are doomed to reinvent it, poorly.\n-- unidentified source
Look, I'm about to buy me a double barreled sawed off shotgun and show Linus what I think about backspace and delete not working.\n-- some anonymous .signature
We apologize for the inconvenience, but we'd still like yout to test out this kernel.\n-- Linus Torvalds, announcing another kernel patch
The new Linux anthem will be "He's an idiot, but he's ok", as performed by Monthy Python.  You'd better start practicing.\n-- Linus Torvalds, announcing another kernel patch
How do you power off this machine?\n-- Linus, when upgrading linux.cs.helsinki.fi, and after using the machine for several months
Excusing bad programming is a shooting offence, no matter _what_ the circumstances.\n-- Linus Torvalds, to the linux-kernel list
Linus?  Whose that?\n-- clueless newbie on #Linux
N: Phil Lewis E: beans@bucket.ualr.edu D: Promised to send money if I would put his name in the source tree. S: PO Box 371 S: North Little Rock, Arkansas 72115 S: US\n-- /usr/src/linux/CREDITS
> You know you are "there" when you are known by your first name, and > are recognized. > Lemmie see, there is Madonna, and Linus, and ..... help me out here! Bill ? ;-)\n-- From some postings on comp.os.linux.misc
Whoa...I did a 'zcat /vmlinuz > /dev/audio' and I think I heard God...\n-- mikecd on #Linux
Some people have told me they don't think a fat penguin really embodies the grace of Linux, which just tells me they have never seen a angry penguin charging at them in excess of 100mph.  They'd be a lot more careful about what they say if they had.\n-- Linus Torvalds, announcing Linux v2.0
MS-DOS, you can't live with it, you can live without it.\n-- from Lars Wirzenius' .sig
.. I used to get in more fights with SCO than I did my girlfriend, but now, thanks to Linux, she has more than happily accepted her place back at number one antagonist in my life..\n-- Jason Stiefel, krypto@s30.nmex.com
I mean, well, if it were not for Linux I might be roaming the streets looking for drugs or prostitutes or something.  Hannu and Linus have my highest admiration (apple polishing mode off).\n-- Phil Lewis, plewis@nyx.nyx.net
"Linux was made by foreign terrorists to take money from true US companies like Microsoft." - Some AOL'er. "To this end we dedicate ourselves..." -Don\n-- From the sig of "Don", don@cs.byu.edu
Shoot me again. Just proving that the quickest way to solve the problem is to post a whine to the newsgroups: within moments the solution presents itself to me, and meanwhile my ass is hanging out on the Net... *sigh*...\n-- Dave Phillips, dlphilp@bright.net, about problem solving via news
> Is there any hope for me? Am I just thick? Does anyone remember the > Rubiks Cube, it was easier! I found that the Rubiks cube and Linux are alike. Looks real confusing until you read the right book. :-)\n-- seen on c.o.l.misc, about the "Linux Learning Curve"
> I've hacked the Xaw3d library to give you a Win95 like interface and it > is named Xaw95. You can replace your Xaw3d library. Oh God, this is so disgusting!\n-- seen on c.o.l.development.apps, about the "Win95 look-alike"
> I get the following error messages at bootup, could anyone tell me > what they mean? > fcntl_setlk() called by process 51 (lpd) with broken flock() emulation They mean that you have not read the documentation when upgrading the kernel.\n-- seen on c.o.l.misc
Only wimps use tape backup: _real_ men just upload their important stuff on ftp, and let the rest of the world mirror it ;)\n-- Linus Torvalds, about his failing hard drive on linux.cs.helsinki.fi
One of the things that hamper Linux's climb to world domination is the shortage of bad Computer Role Playing Games, or CRaPGs. No operating system can be considered respectable without one.\n-- Brian O'Donnell, odonnllb@tcd.ie
The game, anoraks.2.0.0.tgz, will be available from sunsite until somebody responsible notices it and deletes it, and shortly from ftp.mee.tcd.ie/pub/Brian, though they don't know that yet.\n-- Brian O'Donnell, odonnllb@tcd.ie
'Ooohh.. "FreeBSD is faster over loopback, when compared to Linux over the wire". Film at 11.'\n-- Linus Torvalds
Q: Would you like to see the WINE list?|A: What's on it, anything expensive?|Q: No, just Solitaire and MineSweeper for now, but the WINE is free.\n-- Kevin M. Bealer, about the WINdows Emulator
So in the future, one 'client' at a time or you'll be spending CPU time with lots of little 'child processes'.\n-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the private life of a Linux nerd
We should start referring to processes which run in the background by their correct technical name... paenguins.\n-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
We can use symlinks of course... syslogd would be a symlink to syslogp and ftpd and ircd would be linked to ftpp and ircp... and of course the point-to-point protocal paenguin.\n-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
This is a logical analogy too... anyone who's been around, knows the world is run by paenguins.  Always a paenguin behind the curtain, really getting things done.  And paenguins in politics--who can deny it?\n-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
Linux: Where Don't We Want To Go Today?\n-- Submitted by Pancrazio De Mauro, paraphrasing some well-known sales talk
The most important design issue... is the fact that Linux is supposed to be fun...\n-- Linus Torvalds at the First Dutch International Symposium on Linux
In short, at least give the penguin a fair viewing. If you still don't like it, that's ok: that's why I'm boss. I simply know better than you do.\n-- Linus "what, me arrogant?" Torvalds, on c.o.l.advocacy
The linuX Files -- The Source is Out There.\n-- Sent in by Craig S. Bell, goat@aracnet.com
C is quirky, flawed, and an enormous success\n-- Dennis M. Ritchie
If Bill Gates is the Devil then Linus Torvalds must be the Messiah.\n-- Unknown source
Vini, vidi, Linux!\n-- Unknown source
Checking host system type... i586-unknown-linux configure: error: sorry, this is the gnu os, not linux\n-- Topic on #Linux
It's easy to get on the internet and forget you have a life\n-- Topic on #LinuxGER
To kick or not to kick...\n-- Somewhere on IRC, inspired by Shakespeare
Linux - Where do you want to fly today?\n-- Unknown source
The easiest way to get the root password is to become system admin.\n-- Unknown source
The good thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from.\n-- Andrew S. Tanenbaum
The primary difference [...] is that the Java programm will reliably and obviously crash, whereas the C Program will do something obscure\n-- Java Language Tutorial
LOAD "LINUX",8,1\n-- Topic on #LinuxGER
Old MacLinus had a stack/l-i-n-u-x/and on this stack he had a trace/l-i-n-u-x with an Oops-Oops here and an Oops-Oops there here an Oops, there an Oops, everywhere an Oops-Oops.\n-- tjimenez@site.gmu.edu, linux.dev.kernel
Not only Guinness - Linux is good for you, too.\n-- Banzai on IRC
> NE-2000 clone.  Pentium optimizing gcc (pentium gcc pl8 I think).\n^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Build a kernel with the proper gcc. Reports with a non standard compiler are useless.\n-- Alan Cox
BTW: I have a better name for the software .... Microsoft Internet Exploder.\n-- George Bonser <grep@cris.com>
Well, since MS cant be sure of the username of someone downloading things, they are going to play it safe and have everything dowloaded and executed by Explorer as suid root. That way, it will run on ANY system anywhere. :)\n-- George Bonser <grep@cris.com>
If you really want pure ASCII, save it as text... or browse it with your favorite browser...\n-- Alexandre Maret <amaret@infomaniak.ch>
Sorry for mailing this article, I've obviously made a typo (168!=186) that's the price for being up all night and doing some "quick" checks before you go to bed ....\n-- Herbert Rosmanith <herp@wildsau.idv.uni-linz.ac.at>
Just to remind everyone.  Today, Sept 17, is Linux's 5th birthday.  So happy birthday to all on the list.  Thanks go out to Linus and all the other hard-working maintainers for 5 wonderful fast paced years!\n-- William E. Roadcap <roadcapw@cfw.com>
Exporting beer from Finnland doesn't seem to be that much of a hassle, as the Lenigrad Cowboys brought a lot of their brew to the concerts in Austria.\n-- Otmar Lendl <lendl@cosy.sbg.ac.at>
Beeping is cute, if you are in the office ;)\n-- Alan Cox
>  Where in the US is Linus? He was in the "Promise Land".\n-- David S. Miller <davem@caip.rutgers.edu>
>       Yeah, Linus is in the US. > >       His source trees are in Finland.\nOK, someone give him access -fast- ...... ;-)\n-- babydr@nwrain.net, because of problems with the kernel
Subject: Linux box finds it hard to wake up in the morning I've heard of dogs being like their owners, but Linux boxen?\n-- Peter Hunter <peter.hunter@blackfriars.oxford.ac.uk>
*** PUBLIC flooding detected from erikyyy <lewnie> THAT's an erik, pholx.... ;)\n-- Seen on #LinuxGER
I've no idea when Linus is going to release 2.0.24, but if he takes too long Im going to release a 2.0.24unoff and he can sound off all he likes.\n-- Alan Cox
All the existing 2.0.x kernels are to buggy for 2.1.x to be the main goal.\n-- Alan Cox
Computers are useless.  They can only give you answers.\n-- Pablo Picasso
martin@bdsi.com (no longer valid - where are you now, Martin?)\n-- from /usr/src/linux/drivers/cdrom/mcd.c
[...] or some clown changed the chips on a board and not its name. (Don't laugh!  Look at the SMC etherpower for that.)\n-- from /usr/src/linux/MAINTAINERS
REST|P:      Linus Torvalds S:      Buried alive in email\n-- from /usr/src/linux/MAINTAINERS
Why use Windows when you can have air conditioning?\nWhy use Windows, when you can leave through the door?\n-- Konrad Blum
Netscape is not a newsreader, and probably never shall be.\n-- Tom Christiansen
I think it's time to remove Qt and Qt-derived applications from the distributon. By distributing it, we only encourage authors to create restrictive licenses.\n-- Bruce Perens
If someone can point me to a good and _FREE_ backup software that keeps track of which files get stored on which tape, we can change to it.\n-- Mike Neuffer, admin of i-Connect Corp.
Whoa, first contact! [...] Welcome, from the people of Terra (Sol III). We extend our hands in friendship, and sincerely hope you shall do the same with your hand-equivelents.\n-- Jason Burrell about a russian posting
> Whoa, first contact! Nope, 'fraid not, Linux is still primarily used on planet Earth, I'm afraid. Our friend here sent a message in Russian (KOI8-R encoding).\n-- Aleksey Kliger, explaining a russian posting
There is, however, a strange, musty smell in the air that reminds me of something...hmm...yes...I've got it...there's a VMS nearby, or I'm a Blit.\n-- Larry Wall in Configure from the perl distribution
Das ganze Saarland ist von M$ besetzt - das ganze? Nein eine kleine Gruppe im Sudwesten trotzt dem ubergrosen Herrscher dank ihres Zaubertrankes Linux\n-- Tooster on #LinuxGER
1648 files (84%) out of the files that I mirror disappeared.  Since my delete threshold was set at 90%, all those files are now missing from my hard drive.  It's going to take a loooong time to fetch those again via 14.4kbps!\n-- Brian C. White
Whoever asked if the debian organization was dead isn't reading debian-devel. 66 messages in one day, and it's not over. I find it difficult to keep up.\n-- Bruce Perens
>    What is the status of Linux' Unicode implementation. Will Linux >    be prepared for the first contact? We have full klingon console support just in case\n-- Alan Cox on linux-kernel
"You, sir, are nothing but a pathetically lame salesdroid! I fart in your general direction!"\n-- Randseed on #Linux
* Jes wonders why so many people in here uses fooZZZZZ and foo_sleeping nicks <peter> Jes: Because they are sleeping?\n-- Seen on #Linux
* gb notes that fdisk thinks his cdrom can store one terabyte\n-- Seen on #Linux
Check it out, send me comments, and dance joyously in the streets,\n-- Linus Torvalds announcing 2.0.27
Sex dumps core (Sex is a Simple editor for X11)\n-- Seen on debian bugtracking
I tried the clone syscall on me, but it didn't work.\n-- Mike Neuffer trying to fix a serious time problem
-  long    f_ffree;    /* free file nodes in fs */ +  long    f_ffree;    /* freie Dateiknoten im Dateisystem */\n-- Seen in a translation
* Phaedrus wishes he could get a machine that consists of Sparc IO,\nAlpha Processors and sleek design of an SGI <pp> And intel prices\n-- Seen on #Linux
<Tazman> damn my office is cold. <Tazman> need a hot secretary to warm it up.\n-- Seen on #Linux
This is a scsi driver, scraes the shit out of me, therefore I tapdanced and wrote a unix clone around it (C) by linus\n-- Somewhere in the kernel tree
*  This is complicated.  Has to do with interrupts.  Thus, I am\n*  scared witless.  Therefore I refuse to write this function. :-P\n-- From the maclinux patch
Yes I have a Machintosh, please don't scream at me.\n-- Larry Blumette on linux-kernel
<miguel> any new sendmail hole I have to fix before going on vacations?\n-- Seen on #Linux
AUTHOR FvwmAuto just appeared one day, nobody knows how.\n-- FvwmAuto(1x)
<lilo> Fairlight: udp is the light margarine of tcp/ip transport protocols :)\n-- Seen on #Linux
i dont even know if it makes sense at all :) This is an experimental patch for an experimental kernel :))\n-- Ingo Molnar on linux-kernel
Linux - Das System fuer schlaue Maedchen ;)\n-- banshee
If loving linux is wrong, I dont wanna be right.\n-- Topic for #LinuxGER
>>> FreeOS is an english-centric name Have you all been stuck in email, or have any of you tried *pronouncing* that? free-oh-ess? free-ows? fritos? :-)\n-- Mark Eichin
The documentation is in Japanese.  Good luck.\n-- Rich $alz
People are going to scream bloody murder about that.\n-- Seen on linux-kernel
>   1. is qmail as secure as they say? Depends on what they were saying, but most likely yes.\n-- Seen on debian-devel
NEVER RESPOND TO CRITICAL PRESS.  IT IS A GAME YOU CAN ONLY LOSE, AND IT MAKES US LOOK BAD.\n-- Bruce Perens
A feature is nothing more than a bug with seniority.\n-- Unknown source
(It is an old Debian tradition to leave at least twice a year ...)\n-- Sven Rudolph
If a 'train station' is where a train stops, what's a 'workstation'?
Computers are not intelligent.  They only think they are.
"We don't do a new version to fix bugs." - Bill Gates "The new version - it's not there to fix bugs." - Bill Gates\n-- Retranslated from Focus 43/1995, pp. 206-212
The POP3 server service depends on the SMTP server service, which failed to start because of the following error: The operation completed successfully.\n-- Windows NT Server v3.51
Software is like sex; it's better when it's free.\n-- Linus Torvalds
oh okay. my mistake. Yafcot:atj(*), mark * Yet another fool coming over this: according to joey\n-- mark@mail.novare.net
Sorry.  I just realized this sentance makes no sense :)\n-- Ian Main
Netscape is not a newsreader, and probably never shall be.\n-- Tom Christiansen
Stopping Apache webserver...sleeping...starting again...apache: dl-version.c:189|_dl_check_map_versions: Assertion `needed != ((void *)0)' failed noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo\n-- netgod on #Debian at LISC
Make it idiot-proof, and someone will breed a better idiot.\n-- Oliver Elphick
#Debian makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :)\n-- HippieGuy on #Debian
<Myxie> I know. Unless htere is a cookie monster somewhere between us tat muches the amil. <Myxie> amil/mail <Myxie> muches/munches tat/that htere/there <HippieGuy> heheh <HippieGuy> problems? :) * Myxie needs an ircii addon that pipes teh command line through ispell :)\n-- Seen on #Debian
ECRC hat keine lynx komp. seiten, sowas MUSS ja pleite gehen ;-)=\n-- Getty on #LinuxGER
Uh... deity is a word, and diety isn't. Or is it supposed to be one of those recursive acronyms?  Diety Is Excellent To You.  Deity Eats Icecream That's Yellow.  Diety Is Eloping To Yokohama.  I'll stop now.\n-- Guy Maor
Why are there always boycotts?  Shouldn't there be girlcotts too?\n-- argon on #Linux
<sct> Anyone want the new supermount? :) <klogd> whats new aboutit <sct> klogd: It cleans whiter than white. :)\n-- Seen on #Linux
- DDD no longer requires the librx library.  Consequently, librx\nerrors can no more cause DDD to crash.\n-- DDD
snafu = Situation Normal All F%$*ed up
It's computer hardware, of course it's worth having <g>\n-- Espy on #Debian
